Sunday 29 October 2017

USA had a casualty of 0.4 million in the second world war, around the same number as UK.

USSR lost around 20 million, even more than Germany which lost 7.5 million.

I've seen more than 30 movies based on World War 2, most of them are hollywood flicks.
Strangely, I haven't heard of any Russian movie based on the subject. I've seen movies in French, German, and Japanese which deal with the war, so it's not that I'm biased towards the English cinema. But I'm surprised that I've never come across any Russian film.

Sunday 22 October 2017

?

Do you consider yourself better than others?
If those others are happier than you are, what good is being better than them?

Tuesday 15 August 2017

A Journey Through Pain

A couple of days back, I had a tooth removed. The wisdom molar in the upper left side of maxilla (upper jaw). A few years back, I had been told by a dentist that this tooth was going to hurt me in years to come as its decay had already begun then.

I spent three days with the pain.

On the first day, I took a couple of pain killers and wished it would go away. It did. The procrastinator that I am, I hoped that the pain would be temporary and I won't have to see the dentist. Somewhere I also feared that the prophecy of the dentist will come true.

On the second day, the tooth started hurting even more badly. I took one pain killer and the pain eased. Within 15 mins, the tooth started hurting again. The pain got worse. I took another pain killer, then another. And waited. The pain reduced and within half an hour, it went away. Four hours later, it hit me again. I again took 3 pain killers. This time, it took an hour for the pain to go away. I now badly wanted to see a dentist, but it was raining heavily which continued for the day.

In the evening, I went to see a dentist, but it being a Sunday, all the clinics in the vicinity were closed. Also, it was raining heavily. I popped three more pain killers and tried to sleep. But the pain just wouldn't go. It got worse when I tried to lie down. So  I spent the whole night awake, sitting (and trying to sleep) in an upright position. I took more pain killers, tried to wash my mouth with warm water, applied clove oil. I was running out of options and the pain would just not go.

On the third morning, I went to see a dentist. She had one look and said what I had feared. A tooth had to be removed and there was nothing else that could be done. But she called me back in the evening. If I were to miss the appointment in the evening, I would have to wait for three more days to get the tooth extracted.

I spent the day writhing in agony in the office, contorting my face every now and then, unable to concentrate on work. In the evening, I went to the dentist and had the tooth removed.

This was easily the longest I had gone with any kind of physical pain. It was excruciating. And I realised what pain can do to you. In those moments, I was ready to take any medicine, do anything to ease my hurting mouth. The will power, which isn't much anyway, was touching rock bottom. For much of the time, I hardly had any energy to do anything. I started respecting the soldiers who go through extreme training and live in conditions which normal humans can't stand for even minutes.

No wonder, getting rid of drugs is extremely difficult and painful.  

Monday 14 August 2017

?

who are you more afraid of?
The others... Or yourself?

Saturday 12 August 2017

Show. Don't tell.

A key tenet of writing

I think, a key tenet for life

Monday 7 August 2017

Lists

Movies
TV Series
Books
Plays
Food
Restaurants
Road Trips
Cities

A list for everything

And what after it?

Sunday 6 August 2017

?

What is it like to live without looking forward to anything...

I guess I understand why some old people feel extremely lonely

?

What are you so angry about?

Friday 28 July 2017

The Beauty


Isn't this a sight of pure grace.

Sangakkara leaning on his left leg to caress the ball through the covers.

The flow of the bat ending just slightly above his head once the shot is completed.

Cricket is poorer for Sangakkara's retirement.

A compilation of his cover drives here

Wednesday 26 July 2017

?

Are you careful about what you wish for?

Thursday 20 July 2017

?

Don't we all just keep looking for echo chambers

Sunday 9 July 2017

?

Why do you have all those rules

Saturday 1 July 2017

?

How should we look at ourselves

Through what lens

From what distance

In a mirror

Or should we compare ourselves with others

By our own dreams and aspirations

Or through those of our parents

From the eyes of a child

Or those of a wise old man

From the morality of a religion

Or from the new book that you just read

From the viewpoint of the beggar on the street

Or that of a millionaire eating in a plush restaurant


Do our eyes belong to us

Saturday 24 June 2017

Tuesday 13 June 2017

Monday 12 June 2017

The 1000 Upvote Answer

I've been on Quora for around 5 years now and I have spent many hours on the site. In this period, I have written more than 150 answers. Most were poorly written and unsurprisingly, hardly received any upvotes. Now I've deleted around 30 of them which even I didn't feel like reading. 

A few days back, I had written a post on Pragati. So when I saw this question, I decided to write her story. And the answer to the question became my first answer to receive upvotes in excess of 1000. Previously my highest count was 408. 

I had written many answers on history and movie reviews which took a lot of time to write, sometimes even hours. There have been hardly any views on them. I wrote this answer in 15 minutes and it garnered more than 25k views in just 6 days. 

The answer evoked strong emotions and had the elements of shock and tragedy. It made people sad and sympathetic who are moved more by emotions and feelings than by hard facts. Most of the high upvoted answers on Quora are about self help, motivational stories, or tragedies. I had been reading about this for some time and this answer confirmed it. No wonder Donald Trump won in USA. 

I don't feel any sense of joy in receiving 1000 upvotes. It's more of a checklist thing.  It was about Pragati, someone about whom I've been thinking a lot in the past few days. She is one person I never want to forget about. I hope that this answer will serve the purpose. 

Sunday 11 June 2017

Material Possessions I Need (Want?)

  1. A room with a small attached bathroom/toilet - on rent
  2. Enough natural light and air in the room
  3. Study Table with a chair
  4. An almirah - a small one would do
  5. Bed (a mattress would do)
  6. Laptop - preferably macbook pro
  7. Mobile - a normal smartphone would do
  8. Kindle
  9. iPad
  10. Internet Connection - high speed
  11. Shoes (2 Pairs)
  12. Chappals and Sandals - 1 Pair each
  13. Clothes (all of them should fit in one suitcase)
  14. One Pouch consisting of all toiletries
  15. One backpack
  16. Food to be provided daily from outside 
  17. Clothes to be washed in laundromat like service
  18. A Two wheeler - a second hand would do

Thursday 1 June 2017

Pragati

Pragati was a classmate in school and one of the best students in my batch.

Every teacher used to fawn on her.

In 2002, just before our Social Sciences board exam of class X, she took her own life.

She was in depression.

Every now and then I'm reminded of her.

People commit suicide when they are left with no hope, and death seems the only way out. Taking your own life seems to be better than any other option. It's strange. ANY other option!!

Many people call them cowards. I don't think so. It's not the bravest thing to do, true. But it's nigh impossible to put oneself in the shoes of the person who goes through that pain.

Thursday 25 May 2017

Super Series - 2005

In 2005, the World XI played against Australia in a one test and three ODI series. The World XI lost all the matches by a huge margin. And thus, the concept was shelved.

Why, I don't really understand. It was said that players had no motivation and the series was without any context.

I think it was a good idea then and it's a good idea now. The Australian team of that era was so dominant that it was no surprise that World XI lost heavily.

I would love to see that concept tried again in a better way.

Thursday 18 May 2017

A Question of Self Worth

The other day I was travelling in Ola Share when I met a young fellow of around 25-26 years.

He had done his engineering from a private college in Jaipur and an MBA from a less reputed b-school than mine.

In his conversation, he said something which made me realise that he had a very limited understanding of many things.

In my mind, I though less of of him because of his educational background and his views.

So the question is this

What do you attach your self worth to?

Is it the money you have or make? (and the benefits that come along with it)

Is it your educational background?

Is it the clothes you wear?

Is it your beautiful face?

Is it the position you hold in your company/organization?

Is it your beautiful wife/husband?

If the answer to any of the above questions is yes, then your self worth stands on a very weak foundation.  Take any of these away, and you will lose your happiness and peace of mind.

Would I consider myself lesser than a person who has an MBA from Harvard and an engineering degree from MIT, or is a CEO of a hot shot company? Unfortunately, I think I will.

The guy in the Ola share seemed much happier than I am. After he left, I thought of myself as a fool.

Saturday 13 May 2017

Ghalib - A Man for all seasons

रही न ताक़त -ए -गुफ़्तार और अगर हो भी
तो किस उम्मीद पे कहिये कि आरज़ू क्या है

Friday 12 May 2017

Smart People

I was working on something for which I needed some sophisticated online tools.

I asked a guy who was supposed to know about it (In his mails, he would repeatedly ask me if I needed any help regarding this work)

He suggested I do a quick Google search.

Sunday 23 April 2017

Old Memories

It's difficult being single at the age of 31. Most of the friends are married and they want you to be married as well. I wonder if there's a tinge of guilt that they feel for not being around. Not entirely sure.

But people are caught up in family lives. They have to spend time with their in-laws which they don't like. But they accept it because of their spouse (who, not surprisingly, doesn't enjoy spending time with the in-laws either).

Am I being selfish here? Maybe.

I was going through old mails when a seven year old mail caught my eye. It was the pdf  copy of a friend's blog which had ceased to exist. Reading through the posts, I could see the transformation, and the evolution in terms of thought.

I see that change in myself when I go through the earlier blog posts.

*****

It's Sachin Tendulkar's birthday. How much love has this man received!!! Some people call him selfish. They don't understand. He has given too much, way too much to Indians. Even if he was playing just to score runs for himself.

It's also the birthday of a friend.. She was one of the early readers of this blog but has drifted apart after her marriage. I once started a blog with her. Now, I guess, she's much too busy in her married life to care.

I feel angry when people move on. Maybe because I take too much time to do so. It's even more irritating when some of them claim that they still care. They don't. Marriage does that to you.

Spoke to 5 good old friends today(Bansi, Sai, Ritu, Mradul, Gaurav Bhaiya) . I realized this only as I'm writing this.

Some people stay.

I feel grateful.

State of Mind

There's so much I don't understand.

The more I read, the more it gets confusing.

It gets confusing to the point that I can't even argue in favour or against the topic. Mostly I end up ending up agreeing with both parties while listening to their points of views.

But how does one know which side is talking more sense?
I don't necessarily need to take sides, but I should be clear in my head what course of action to take should the situation arises. 

Saturday 22 April 2017

On Rahul Dravid

There are few people I admire more than Rahul Dravid.

I don't think many people will remember his batting or watch its reruns on Youtube the way they do it for Sachin or Lara. It wasn't attractive. I don't aspire for the kind of success that he had on the field. Not that I can achieve that. It's Rahul Dravid, the human being that I find so inspiring. There are few people in the history of Indian cricket who are known so much for their humility, their hard work, and their team-ethics.

I doubt if I'll enjoy cricket as much as I did when they were around


I learned about him through what his peers had to say in their various essays on Cricinfo. The essays were compiled into a book called "Timeless Steel" which has strangely gone out of print.

Here's the link to his speech in Australia for Bradman's oration. The link starts at the place where he talks about the importance of fan to the game. The complete transcript is here.

I want to be like Rahul Dravid. 

Wednesday 19 April 2017

On Social Media

I don't write much on Fb, Quora, Twitter.
I visited Twitter for some time today. Too many people shouting out their opinions telling us how they believe the world should run. Yeah, right.

Mostly I feel too insignificant to consider my opinions important enough. Maybe because I feel that others' opinions aren't important either. I don't care what other people think about Sonu Nigam's tweet regarding Azaan, or what Virat Kohli thinks about Anushka Sharma.

Yes, I know the impact of social media on marketing and how it's shaping consumer behaviour. But to me, mostly it's just noise. 

Some people's opinions do count though. Those who have their "skin in the game". I like to read their opinions. Rest don't matter.

Of all the stuff said by Taleb, the concept of "skin in the game" is what I liked the most. Even then, I don't quite enjoy the guy. The problem is, most of the stuff that he talks about is the age old wisdom and he's just promoting it by abusing others. I don't find him original except in his methods to get himself heard. 

Then there's the technical stuff regarding randomness and the black swan events. I don't understand it much. Neither do I understand the work of others whom he criticizes. So I reserve my judgment.

I liked the book "Antifragile" as it made me think. But then, I also read a few books on investing e.g. The Intelligent Investor, The Most Important Thing, The Essays of Warren Buffett etc. I realized that what Taleb is saying has been said by the likes Ben Graham and Warren Buffett umpteen number of times already. 

I digress. 

Blogger is more of a personal diary now. Few people care to visit this place and I like it that way.

Tuesday 18 April 2017

On India

In the last 70 years, have we achieved much? or we fall short of what we could have done?

I am not proud of India, or of Indians.

But there are things that Indians have done well - Space programme and software come to mind. We are considered a military power and the permanent membership of security council is often talked about.

Who should we compare ourselves with?
African countries still reeling in poverty, or China which has grown by leaps and bounds?

Is this democracy a success? We have done well when compared to Pakistan, or Myanmar.
Or would we have been better off by being a political economy like that of China or Singapore?

I don't feel proud or inferior.
I'm just curious.

Thursday 6 April 2017

Misbah ul Haq will retire after the West Indies series. There are few cricketers I respect more. This is one of my favourite articles written on Misbah by Jarrod Kimber.

***

Why is there no celebrity outrage against Shivsena MP Ravindra Gaikwad? All these celebrities went after a 20 year old Gurmehar Kaur. Bunch of hypocrites.

***

I think people in my peer group are more active on LinkedIn than on Facebook.

***

I have only seen black and white photographs of my grandparents of the time before I was born. Also, the movies of that era were rarely made in colour. I could only imagine the times of my grandparents in black & white. 

Sunday 2 April 2017

Denial

I think I have always lived in denial. Probably still do.

These days I keep reading Calvin & Hobbes and to a great extent I can identify with Calvin. 
There's something timeless about human behaviour and psychology. I find it strange that we aren't taught that in our schools and colleges. 



For a long time I had an image of self. That of a very liberal and an open individual.
Now I know, I am no different from many other hypocrites.
For too long I have lived in denial.
And after 31 years, it's difficult to get rid of the mindset.

I can pin the blame on the society, family, and my upbringing. But then I'll be lying. As I always have. Most importantly, to myself.

Reality is harsh. And it hurts.

Saturday 1 April 2017

On Sachin Tendulkar (again)

His batting didn't have

the beauty of Mark Waugh and VVS Laxman
the flair of Lara
the determination of Jacques Kallis
the patience of Dravid
the arrogance of Viv Richards
the solid defence of Gavaskar

but,
he had everything in good measure
Which is why he is my favourite batsman :)

Wednesday 29 March 2017

Proust Questionnaire

You can tell a lot about a person through Proust Questionnaire.

I recently came across this on Facebook and tried it with three friends. I didn't learn much as all of them happened to be close friends but it made all of them think a lot about life and what they wanted out of it.

Below is the list of questions containing my answers.
  1. What is your idea of perfect happiness?
    • A night out with MNIT friends
  2. What is your greatest fear?
    • That I'll be dependent on someone completely
  3. What is the trait you most deplore in yourself?
    • Extreme indecisiveness
  4. What is the trait you most deplore in others?
    • Arrogance/lack of empathy
  5. Which living person do you most admire?
    • Bill Gates, Rahul Dravid comes a close second
  6. What is your greatest extravagance?
    • Flights to friends' weddings/many unread books
  7. What is your current state of mind?
    • Confusion, Anxiety, Restlessness 
  8. What do you consider the most overrated virtue?
    • Ability to make money
  9. On what occasion do you lie?
    • When I don't want to turn up somewhere
  10. What do you most dislike about your appearance?
    • Slouching back
  11. Which living person do you most despise?
    • Karan Johar, Ravindra Gaikwad (no one in particular actually)
  12. What is the quality you most like in a man?
    • Strength of character/Care
  13. What is the quality you most like in a woman?
    • Strength of character/Care
  14. Which words or phrases do you most overuse?
    • Kya Bakwas Hai
  15. What or who is the greatest love of your life?
    • Watching the batting of Sachin Tendulkar
  16. When and where were you happiest?
    • 2004 School Farewell (was nominated for the best boy)
  17. Which talent would you most like to have?
    • Playing Guitar
  18. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?
    • Indecisiveness/Procrastination (first leads to second)
  19. What do you consider your greatest achievement?
    • That I helped a few people in getting admissions for higher studies
    • Made it to the semifinals of a national level quiz almost single handed
  20. If you were to die and come back as a person or a thing, what would it be?
    • A doctor who also teaches
    • Bill Gates (for the sheer impact he has had on the world)
  21. Where would you most like to live?
    • London (now), Bhutan (after retirement)
  22. What is your most treasured possession?
    • A letter from a friend which he left before leaving for abroad
  23. What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery?
    • Loneliness caused by one's own actions
  24. What is your favorite occupation?
    • A good quiz session
  25. What is your most marked characteristic?
    • A helpful person
  26. What do you most value in your friends?
    • Care
  27. Who are your favorite writers?
    • William Dalrymple (English), Shivaji Sawant (Hindi), Ghalib (urdu)
  28. Who is your hero of fiction?
    • Phileas Fogg (Around The World In 80 days)
  29. Which historical figure do you most identify with?
    • No one (If I had to name one, I would say Nehru, very remotely though)
  30. Who are your heroes in real life?
    • Those who do the right thing irrespective of the situation
  31. What are your favorite names?
    • Aditya, Anjali, Kabir
  32. What is it that you most dislike?
    • People not respecting my time
  33. What is your greatest regret?
    • That I didn't treat well some people who loved me 
  34. How would you like to die?
    • In sleep
  35. What is your motto?
    • Do no harm, help when you can

Saturday 18 March 2017

मैंने टाटा का नमक खाया है

Every time I think about the Tatas, my respect for them grows.
They have given so much to India,so much to us.

I visit Tata NCPA every now and then.
I read about TISS a few days ago about the work they have been doing.
My sister was treated at Tata Memorial.

And this I am talking about things Tatas are not known for.

If there's an after life, and if Jamsetji Tata could see his legacy, will he not be proud?

There are few people in the history who have given so much to so many.



Saturday 4 March 2017

Plays in Mumbai

The list of plays that I've seen in Mumbai
  1. Mai Huun Yusuf Aur Ye Hai Mera Bhai
  2. Dhumrapan
  3. Broken Images
  4. Love Letters
  5. Naqqash
  6. The Interview
  7. Chuhal
  8. Dopehri
  9. Mera Vo Matlab Nahi Tha
  10. Ek Mulaqat
  11. Ismat Aapa Ke Naam - 1
  12. Ismat Aapa Ke Naam - 2
  13. Gadha aur Gaddha
  14. Einstein
  15. Kaifi Aur Mai
  16. Dinner with Friends
  17. Vagina Monologues

What Would You Do...

When you get what you wanted...

And then ..will you wonder
Why did you want it in first place

Thursday 2 March 2017

Fuck You!!

To all those who are trolling Gurmehar Kaur on any form of social media.
That includes you, Virender Sehwag, Yogeshwar Dutt, Phogat Sisters. And those paragons of patriotism and nationalism who chose to remain silent.
I respected you. Not any more.




Friday 24 February 2017

Love Letters

Have you ever written letters? I used to, until very recently, even when they have gone out of fashion. On student exchange, while everyone else used to post photographs on fb, I used to send postcards to loved ones. I tried writing letters even after that, but people don't revert any more. So "Love Letters" represents a welcome departure in this age of Facebook and Whatsapp. What else can compare with the romance of waiting for the letter of your loved one in this modern age?

On 21st Feb, I went to see Love Letters, an epistolary play written by A.R. Gurney, and nominated for Pulitzer Prize in 1988. In the Indian theater circles, it's considered a classic and is being played for more than 20 years now by Rage Productions.

The play features Rajit Kapoor (of Byomkesh Bakshi fame) as Andrew Makepeace Ladd III, and Shernaz Patel (Guzaarish and Black) as Melissa. Theater aficianados would remember "Tumhari Amrita", a play starring Faroukh Sheikh and Shabana Azmi which stopped running after the death of Faroukh Sheikh. Tumhari Amrita was inspired by Love Letters. While in the former, the actors read the letters, here, the letters are memorized and performed.

Andrew and Melissa become friends at the age of six and their friendship lasts for more than 50 years. In this period, they exchange letters and share their experiences where they discuss everything down to the smallest detail - parents, school, college, love, sex, career, marital discord, divorce, kids etc. Both are born in rich families and lead a privileged life. But money doesn't bring happiness and both yearn for a meaningful romantic relationship all their lives. With time, their lives drift apart, but the relationship gets deeper. Many letters are lengthy, some end in a single line. As the play progresses, we feel their joys and sorrows, melancholy and laughter, and live through their victories and defeats. 



The only let down was the period of their childhood where Rajit Kapoor's acting seemed a bit over the top. Shernaz Patel, however, was flawless throughout and steals the show as we live her journey from a carefree girl to a rebellious teenager to a desperate alcoholic middle aged woman.

The play uses props in a very innovative way. The boxes on which the actors sit are painted in different colours. As their life goes through different phases, the actors change the face of the box having a different colour depicting different emotions. Mostly, especially in the second half, the colour is black.

I've been friends with some girls for more than 20 years now and am still in regular touch with a few. It reminded me of the silly things we used to talk about when we were kids and how the conversations have changed over the years. At some level, I could connect with the play, which I'm sure everyone would. In the crowd, I could see plenty of old people heartily enjoying the jokes and feeling nostalgic. In these lifetime of letters, many audience were reliving their own lives. Perhaps, that is the reason for this play's longevity.

Monday 13 February 2017

The Mandatory Birthday Post

8 साल का हो गया है ये blog।  कमबख्त शुरू भी कैसे दिन किया था।

दिमाग थोड़ा सा ख़राब लगता है आजकल। अनाप शनाप कुछ भी चलता रहता है।
खाली तो नहीं है लेकिन भूसा ज़रूर भरा हुआ है दिमाग में ।

ग़ालिब क्यों नहीं पढ़ते आजकल हम लोग?
गुलज़ार की आवाज़ मुझे उतनी ही पसंद है  जितनी उनकी शायरी।

कल बड़े दिनों के बाद गुलज़ार की ये नज़्म समझ में  आयी।

Sunday 12 February 2017

The Purpose

I read on Quora that we don't need purpose. There is no purpose but to live, live well, and leave.
It doesn't make sense much. Nothing ever did anyway. 
And I keep running confused. Life would be great if it were on autopilot. 
Friends are buying cars, and houses, and shares from stock market.
They invest. 
I still find it all very boring. Everything seems like a chore. Or to fulfill a purpose. The purpose varies. To find a new job, buy a house, new car, get married, have a holiday abroad, read a new book, meet new people, network, make that call....

सचिन की batting  के पुराने video आज भी अच्छे लगते है।  
कोहली की बैटिंग अच्छी है,  पर पहला प्यार भुलाये नहीं भूलता :) 

कुछ लोगों के साथ वक़्त अच्छा गुज़र जाता है. 

जो ख़त्म हो रही है, वो ज़िन्दगी है।  
I don't read blogs I used to any more. Friends have stopped blogging. Even the other people who were regular at blogging don't do it any more.
Is it because of Facebook, Quora, Twitter, Instagram?
Not sure.
But I like returning to this place every now and then.
Hardly anybody reads it now. Which is why I also feel like writing more for myself. Earlier I used to scribble here so that the very few who do read it, might drop a comment or two. That is not the case any more. I can write with freedom, or to put in other words, without caring for anybody.
This situation is not good, because now I don't think about or review my writing any more.
It is unstructured and incoherent. And bad.
But I like it better here this way.

ग़ालिब ये ख्याल अच्छा है

नुक्ता-चीं है ग़म-ए-दिल उस को सुनाए  बने

क्या बने बात जहाँ बात बताए  बने 

--ग़ालिब 

Friday 10 February 2017

The Great Indian Cricket Team

Too much is being said of the invincibility of the cricket team led by Virat Kohli. Yes, Virat Kohli has performed exceptionally well in the past one year. But these days Ravindra Jadeja and R. Ashwin are being touted as the all-rounders which makes me laugh. Jadeja is a bits and pieces of everything (or nothing) and I am yet to see Ashwin perform well in overseas conditions be it batting or bowling (I'm not counting West Indies here). 

In the current team, Rahane walks out at number 5 after Kohli. Beyond that, I'm not sure if the present batting line up can survive in bowling friendly conditions.

In many ways, I think of the present team as the one led by Mohammad Azharuddin in the 90s. They were virtually impossible to beat at home riding on the backs of spin bowling of Kumble, Raju, and co. This team and its so called allrounders will be tested in England, South Africa and Australia. 

Thursday 9 February 2017

A Thought Experiment

Rakesh asked me a question today which made me think a lot. Rakesh has this habit of of asking very probing questions. The question was this :

"Given a chance, name three people whom you would like to bring back from history."

I usually think of myself well versed with history. But this question gave me a rude shock. I could hardly remember anybody from UK, Egypt, China, or Mesopotamia who would be relevant even today. Not that I knew people from other countries/civilizations, but I could at least think of someone important from these lands.

So I could zero in on three names.

1. Mahatma Gandhi
I think Gandhi is a man for all seasons and will be relevant for all generations to come. No one, at least not in recent times has revolutionized the way we think and act as much as Gandhi.

2. Muhammad
I would like to bring him back so that people (and most importantly muslims) across the world could actually see and understand what he meant; if he is really the prophet many people believe him to be or was just a warlord who influenced humanity in a big way. Maybe, by seeing his reality, the world would be a saner place.

3. Gautam Buddha
It was tough to pick between Jesus and Buddha. But then, I think the teachings of Buddha are far more relevant in today's world than Jesus'. Moreover, Buddha didn't claim any divinity nor was there any talk about him being the son/prophet of god. He was a teacher/philosopher who preached peace.

Please note that I picked three people who would be relevant today, not the top three people I believe have influenced history. Also, as I went through the list by Time magazine, what I found startling was that politicians and scientists have influenced history far more than anybody else, including the scientists.

However, more than anything, I realized how woefully limited my knowledge of history is. The first thing I did in the morning was to check up the list of 100 most influential people in the history. There were plenty whom I didn't even consider and then there were many whose name I didn't know.

I have to read more.

Wednesday 8 February 2017

I've studied in two colleges; MNIT and IIM Lucknow. And there was a stark contrast about how I felt about these two institutes. I absolutely hated MNIT, the college, but loved the people I met there. Maybe because it was a part of growing up and sharing the best of youth with the carefree people around who didn't look beyond that day. It was a slow but a very happy life in the days of MNIT.

IIM Lucknow was a different world. I absolutely loved the college for the facilities, administration, and the quality of teaching, but hated many of my batchmates. It's funny what money does to people. Everyone was a competitor, and nobody was a friend. Everyone was seen as a potential threat to the job offer one wanted. I'm sure the same people were very different in their undergraduate days. 

The toppers in MNIT were known to help their classmates. In IIM Lucknow, the toppers were the people abhorred by the most. Simply because of the extent to which they went to ensure that the other person doesn't get close to their grades. 

Placement committee was one committee everyone disliked but kowtowed to. Because they controlled the placements, the very thing we were spending 15 lacs rupees for. And like most of the dictatorial governments, they said this in the name of helping people. "Oh! We have to be strict so that the batch gets the best placements." There's a broad line between being strict and being an asshole. And the placement committees were assholes by a distance. 

But we were the weaklings. IIM Lucknow showed me what the world is actually like. Give people money and power, and they will show you their real face. 

I miss both the places. MNIT for the friends, IIM for the college it was. 

Monday 6 February 2017

हैरत

एक  दुनिया है जो छूट गयी है पीछे। 
कभी कभी अच्छा लगता है पुराने blog posts  पढ़ कर. 
खुद के ही नहीं, दोस्तों के भी।
मैं तब ज्यादा समझदार था या आज ज़्यादा बेवकूफ हूँ, ये समझ नहीं पाता। 
किताबें थोड़ी ज्यादा पढ़ ली हैं।दुनियादारी की समझ थोड़ी ज्यादा है पहले से।

सब लोग ज्यादा पैसा कमा रहे हैं।  इतना कि कभी सोचा करते थे कि इसका आधा भी कमा लेंगे तो  मस्त रहेंगे. लेकिन कम ही  खुश है।
जो दोस्त 7-8  साल पहले प्यार मोहब्बत की बातें करते थे, आज घर और गाडी की EMI की बातें करते है।
पहले सचिन के रन गिनते थे, आज stock market और investments की बातें करते है. कुछ दिन बाद बच्चों के बारे में करेंगे। काफी बाल सफ़ेद हो  चले है. काफी झड़ भी गए हैं।  कुछ ही साल में हम आपस में बीमारी पर चर्चा करेंगे। 

उन्ही चेहरों में पुराने दोस्त ढूँढता हूँ तो नहीं मिलते।


ये होना ही था। कोई अनहोनी नहीं हुई है इन सब में।
कोई दुःख भी नहीं है कि कुछ भी पहले जैसा नहीं रहा है।
लेकिन हैरानी होती है कि इतना जल्दी सब कुछ बदल गया है।

Monday 23 January 2017

वक़्त बहुत कुछ सिखा देता है धीरे धीरे अपने आप. वो सब भी जो आप कभी सीखना नहीं चाहते थे. आपको वो भी महसूस करा देता है जो आपको लगता था कि आप कभी महसूस नहीं करेंगे. वो आइना भी दिखाता है जो आप कभी देखना नहीं चाहते थे.
कुछ हुआ नहीं , फेसबुक पर कुछ पुराने लोग दिख गए और थोड़ी यादें ताज़ा हो गयी.
ऐसे ही लिख दिया कि कुछ लिखने का मन कर रहा था.

Saturday 14 January 2017

एक पुरानी दोस्त से whatsapp पर बकर काट रहा था। पता नहीं क्या सूझा कि हिंदी में लिखना शुरू कर दिया. तपाक से बोली, ये क्या नौटंकी कर रहा है। हिंदी में मत लिख, समझने में दिक्कत होती है।

एक समय था जब मुझे इंग्लिश समझ नहीं आती थी। इंग्लिश की फिल्म देखने में एड़ी चोटी का ज़ोर लग जाता था, अख़बार पढ़ना तो बहुत दूर की बात थी।

आज परेशानी उलटी है। हिंदी फिल्म देखे हुए अरसा बीत जाता है, हिंदी का अख़बार घटिया लगता है, और अब दोस्तों से  इंग्लिश में ही बात होती है। ATM पर भी कभी हिंदी भाषा नहीं चुनता हूँ पैसे निकलते वक़्त।
कई बार शर्मिंदगी सी होती  कि अपनी जड़ों से अलग सा हो गया हूँ।

कल मृदुल के एक दोस्त निखिल से मिला जो हिंदी में उपन्यास लिखता है। उसने कुछ अच्छी किताबें बताई हैं पढ़ने के लिए।

ऐसे दौरे हर साल के शुरू में पड़ते है। कि इस साल शायद उर्दू पढ़ना सीख जाऊँगा, 50 किताबें पढ़ लूँगा , खाना बनाना सीख लूँगा और कुछ ऐसे ही खयाली पुलाव। देखते हैं..

P.S. : पथिक दिल्ली-6 के गाने चला रहा है। ये गाना काफी पसंद था...

Saturday 7 January 2017

On Investing - Part 2

The more I read about investing, the more I realize what all I have missed in the past 7-8 years. Apart from building wealth, by investing, especially in the stock market, one learn about oneself a lot.

Psychology and Philosophy have as much, if not more role to play in this discipline as knowledge of finance and statistics. It requires patience, and being calm under pressure especially when the market is going down and you see your wealth getting reduced because of market madness. My senior in the company, who actually pushed me in this direction, tells me that it's all about having stomach, to be able to stick to your beliefs when everyone else is telling you otherwise.

Also, the more I watch the Youtube lectures of famous investors, or read their essays and letters, the more I realize that none of them ever offer any stock advice but stick to talking about the principles which made them achieve superior returns.

It's an interesting and challenging field. And it's difficult. Which is why it's so much fun!!

Thursday 5 January 2017

On Investing

One of the very few things that I realized in 2016 was the importance of investing money for the future. I had not given it a thought until late because I hardly ever had money in my account. Around December'15, I paid off my loan. For the first time I had some disposable cash about which I didn't know what to do. Around the same time, my boss recommended me to read "The Intelligent Investor". It's one of the best books written on investment by Benjamin Graham, the father of value investing. As my interest grew, I read some more.
In this short duration, I have hardly learned anything; but these books have given me a direction. More than anything else, it kindled my interest in Finance, something I had long given up on.
Here's a list of the books, videos, and blogs I would recommend to anybody who wants to invest in stock market. One thing that is to be kept in mind is that there's no shortcut and investing is a very difficult art to learn. Like any other art, it takes years, even decades to become a good investor. I hope that in time, I will be able to do well for myself.

Books
  1. The Intelligent Investor by Ben Graham 
  2. Security Analysis by Ben Graham, David Todd
  3. The Most Important Thing by Howard Marks
  4. Essays of Warren Buffett by Lawrence Cunningham
  5. Margin of Safety by Seth Klarman
  6. One Up on The Wall Street by Peter Lynch
  7. A Random Walk Down Wall Street by Burton Malkiel
  8. Poor Charlie's Almanack by Charles Munger
Essays/Letters/Memos
  1. Warren Buffett's Letters to Shareholders - Berkshire Hathaway
  2. Howard Marks Memos - Oaktree Capital
Blogs
  1. Safal Niveshak
  2. Ashwath Damodaran on Valuation
 Videos
  1. Google Talk Videos

On Friendship - Part 2

"We check our leave balances when we need vacations, we need to save them for our marriage, or kids or for any kind of emergency. We are such fools. But its life, thats the price we have  to pay. We cant really go on living each day fearing we might not get up tomorrow. But there are things we can do. Like not switching off phone on our birthdays :)

You are a very special friend and annoying and sometimes very irritating and illogical. But you are among those very few with who I can share my most personal and complicated problems. Thankyou for being there :) "

-- A response to the mail that I had written on 1st Jan.

Monday 2 January 2017

On Friendship

I think I make a good friend. At least I’ve tried to be one. Not that I haven’t failed in this regard, but usually I try to put my best foot forward.

On the 1st Jan this year, I tried an experiment. I mailed all the people whom I considered were good friends at any point in my 31 years of life. People who were important to me, with whom I shared some very happy memories. 

I wanted to apologize for any wrong I had done as well as thank for whatever good time I had spent with them. It was an emotional mail, something people don’t usually say. Sometimes it makes you uncomfortable. I was too.

Most people replied. Some said they were happy to hear from me that they meant so much to me. Some replied just with a thanks and what was going on in their lives. Some friends just asked me if I was ok that I was writing such emotional mails.

The best came from the closest friends, with whom I have maintained contact for more than 10 years or so. They abused me for sending such stupid mails and for having lost my mind. Only a close friend can abuse you so openly and be fine with it. 

And there were some more people, who I presume, just ignored the letter. Even while writing the mail I had an inkling about who all will not reply. They read the mail but decided not revert. Some of them have grown out of the friendship, some just don’t want to be friends any more, some don’t care, and others, well, I guess they are just plain angry.

I think it was a good idea to write this mail even if it was slightly embarrassing to open the heart out. More than anything, it told me where I don’t have to concentrate my energies any more. Not because I don’t want to, but because some people don’t want me back. And even though it’s a bit disturbing and saddening, it’s fine.